The next morning dawns bright and clear, and up gets the tour leader to put the kettle on for her beloved passengers. Duly boiled, it is transported back to the truck and placed amongst the breakfast fare.
Tour leader goes away to do various duties. Later, after all is packed away, we leave and pull into a service station after a couple of hours for a toilet break.
Tour leader is duly surprised that everyone is claiming desperate thirst and need for coffee.
MORAL OF THE STORY: if you are going to illicitly use kettle as impromptu punch receptacle, empty it. Otherwise contents WILL be inadvertently be boiled up and served to you for breakfast.
Much love
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Racing to the end...
Our least few days on tour are a mixture of beautiful scenery, activities and packing...
A major stop, and our last in Namibia is Fish River Canyon - the views, the thermal springs, and the oven baked lasagne all combine to provide fanastic experiences, and luckily its a little bit warmer than we have been used to at night (see the fashion shoot).
All too soon it is time to wave goodbye to Namibia and on to South Africa. We stay at a new campsite - Umkulu - on the Orange River, and despite there being plenty of activities on offer - rafting/ canoeing and sunset walks, by this time legathy has set in and everyone just chills. That night we chow down on Kudu steaks and gird ourselves for one final assault before Capetown - its nearly time for winetasting...
....which does not disappoint. Priced at a very reasonable 55R for the guarantee that you will feel 'internally warm' inside. This is followed by a group meal (not a good idea to wield cooking instruments after said tasting) and a knees-up until the early hours.
A major stop, and our last in Namibia is Fish River Canyon - the views, the thermal springs, and the oven baked lasagne all combine to provide fanastic experiences, and luckily its a little bit warmer than we have been used to at night (see the fashion shoot).
All too soon it is time to wave goodbye to Namibia and on to South Africa. We stay at a new campsite - Umkulu - on the Orange River, and despite there being plenty of activities on offer - rafting/ canoeing and sunset walks, by this time legathy has set in and everyone just chills. That night we chow down on Kudu steaks and gird ourselves for one final assault before Capetown - its nearly time for winetasting...
....which does not disappoint. Priced at a very reasonable 55R for the guarantee that you will feel 'internally warm' inside. This is followed by a group meal (not a good idea to wield cooking instruments after said tasting) and a knees-up until the early hours.
Fashion guidance: how to be a successful overlander
Fashion shoot: step by step guide to fashion SUCCESS
Location: Dune 45
Models: Debatable
Rule 1: Pick beautiful location
Rule 2: add some models...
Rule 3: Remember the Namibian winter gets cold. It is important to counteract this
Rule 4: Accessorise. Accessorise. Accessorise.
Rule 5: You may lose 70% of heat from your head but look after those toes.
Rule 6: Uncertainty of to origin of clothes (is it a towel? a scarf? an animal?) should not prevent it being put to use
Rule 7: Adopt fashion trends from home. High trousers? Check. Tucked in tops? Check. Sultry expressions... check?
Rule 8: Rock that bare legged, socks and shoes look. You KNOW it looks good
Rule 9: Rest assured that no matter how ridiculous you look, one member of the tour will always look more so - thats right - meet the tour leader
(personally I think people dream to look like this)
Location: Dune 45
Models: Debatable
Rule 1: Pick beautiful location
Rule 2: add some models...
Rule 3: Remember the Namibian winter gets cold. It is important to counteract this
Rule 4: Accessorise. Accessorise. Accessorise.
Rule 5: You may lose 70% of heat from your head but look after those toes.
Rule 6: Uncertainty of to origin of clothes (is it a towel? a scarf? an animal?) should not prevent it being put to use
Rule 7: Adopt fashion trends from home. High trousers? Check. Tucked in tops? Check. Sultry expressions... check?
Rule 8: Rock that bare legged, socks and shoes look. You KNOW it looks good
Rule 9: Rest assured that no matter how ridiculous you look, one member of the tour will always look more so - thats right - meet the tour leader
(personally I think people dream to look like this)
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Swakopmund...
Swakopmund. Home of overlanding adrenaline south of Vic Falls. Sadly no skydiving on the agenda, but there is still plenty to entertain all.
One of the restaurant institutions in Swakopmund is Napolitanas - and the group indulge in the truly massive portions. It has been subtly suggested that doggy bags may be required, but despite these warnings, a few people actually manage to finish their plate and therefore spend the night in a self induced food coma.
The next day is activity day and some go sandboarding (top speed - 75kph), some go quadbiking and some go for a more relaxing option and take up the offer of a massage from Kath (ex-Acacia tour leader) and a dolphin cruise.
This involves close encounters with dolphins (whose loving of the boat is for less savoury reasons than would be anticipated - the vibrations of the boat in the water increases a dolphins urge for sexual activity... not so sweet and innocent!), pelicans (no vibration attractions), seals (hopefully no vibrationary attractions as they ended up on the boat with us) and champagne and oysters to finish - life is tough!
Its hard to drag ourselves away from Swakop, especially as we've had two nights in dorm beds - possibly the nicest dorms in the world - but we've got a way to go yet...
One of the restaurant institutions in Swakopmund is Napolitanas - and the group indulge in the truly massive portions. It has been subtly suggested that doggy bags may be required, but despite these warnings, a few people actually manage to finish their plate and therefore spend the night in a self induced food coma.
The next day is activity day and some go sandboarding (top speed - 75kph), some go quadbiking and some go for a more relaxing option and take up the offer of a massage from Kath (ex-Acacia tour leader) and a dolphin cruise.
This involves close encounters with dolphins (whose loving of the boat is for less savoury reasons than would be anticipated - the vibrations of the boat in the water increases a dolphins urge for sexual activity... not so sweet and innocent!), pelicans (no vibration attractions), seals (hopefully no vibrationary attractions as they ended up on the boat with us) and champagne and oysters to finish - life is tough!
Its hard to drag ourselves away from Swakop, especially as we've had two nights in dorm beds - possibly the nicest dorms in the world - but we've got a way to go yet...
Monday, May 16, 2011
Namibia...
Highlights of the tour so far in this country:
* Stalking lions in Etosha NP (thats lions that were stalking, not that we were chasing them)
* Meal at Joe's beerhouse in Windhoek - zebra, ostrich, kudu, oryx, croc all devoured
* Revisitation of 'lamb' night from Malawi
* No revisitation of punch night from Malawi and Botswana (so far)
* Epic games of hearts. Inducing overcompetitiveness all round.
* Sleeping outside, watching shooting stars and nebula at Spitzkoppe. Some of the group opted for gollum-esque cave dwelling instead.
* No more malaria zone!
* Dom Pedro
* Quadbiking, sandboarding
* Dolphin cruise and hugging seals
* Stalking lions in Etosha NP (thats lions that were stalking, not that we were chasing them)
* Meal at Joe's beerhouse in Windhoek - zebra, ostrich, kudu, oryx, croc all devoured
* Revisitation of 'lamb' night from Malawi
* No revisitation of punch night from Malawi and Botswana (so far)
* Epic games of hearts. Inducing overcompetitiveness all round.
* Sleeping outside, watching shooting stars and nebula at Spitzkoppe. Some of the group opted for gollum-esque cave dwelling instead.
* No more malaria zone!
* Dom Pedro
* Quadbiking, sandboarding
* Dolphin cruise and hugging seals
Monday, May 9, 2011
Delta time...
Botswana means Chobe and the Okavango Delta to most overlanders, and neither disappointed this time...
Chobe NP started off our next leg of the tour nicely - lots of elephant and a 'nearly' lion hunt (or so I'm assured - the actual sighting was of a lion lying down, idly watching some passing (terrified) impala.)
64,000 elephants populate Chobe, and a couple of herds duly rocked up at the waters edge during our cruise to show off...
600km later and we are in Maun, and head off to the delta. After an exceptionally long mokoro ride of 4 hours to get right into the wildeness, we set up camp, swim, battle each other aboard the mokoros - which sink - and generally cause havoc in the swimming area. We are lucky and get to see a lot of game including wildebeest, zebra and elephant - both on foot and on the mokoros. Also, less excitingly, spiders and mosquitos, which the polers assure us are our friends. Consensus of the group indicates this is a lie.
Chobe NP started off our next leg of the tour nicely - lots of elephant and a 'nearly' lion hunt (or so I'm assured - the actual sighting was of a lion lying down, idly watching some passing (terrified) impala.)
64,000 elephants populate Chobe, and a couple of herds duly rocked up at the waters edge during our cruise to show off...
600km later and we are in Maun, and head off to the delta. After an exceptionally long mokoro ride of 4 hours to get right into the wildeness, we set up camp, swim, battle each other aboard the mokoros - which sink - and generally cause havoc in the swimming area. We are lucky and get to see a lot of game including wildebeest, zebra and elephant - both on foot and on the mokoros. Also, less excitingly, spiders and mosquitos, which the polers assure us are our friends. Consensus of the group indicates this is a lie.
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Ramblings on Zambia
Having published various musings on Malawi, my dear tour leader, Pol Pot, has assured me that if I fail to post something similar on Zambia, she will house a dead fish in my locker on the bus for the remaining three weeks of the trip. So I must issue a simila
r health warning, read on only if the only alternative activity is akin to watching Jeremy Kyle, eating a tramp's toenails, etc etc.
To spare any innocent and unsuspecting visitor to this page too
much pain, I will focus on Livingstone, home of the Victoria Falls and adrenaline capital of Africa. Victoria Falls in high water (when the greatest volume of water passes over the Falls) is surely one of the most magnificent sights on earth. The foam that it churns up when it meets the seething turmoil of the Zambezi below is best seen from the air, in a microlight plane (a golf buggy with wings). Nature at its most terrible and awe inspiring. David Livingstone (legend) put it best when he declared of the Falls, "It had never been seen before by European eyes, but scenes so lovely must surely have been gazed upon by angels in their flight." Sounds like a corny chat up line, but it so perfectly encapsulates the experience of witnessing the falls at full flow.
Having duly admired one of the seven natural wonders of the world, we embarked upon the serious business of casting ourselves into the gorge from a great height. The smell of fear and soiled pants was palpable as we defied every rational human instinct towa
rds the frothing Zambezi below and leaped 111 metres held only by a glorified elastic band around our feet. It is indescribably torturous when staring into the abyss, but the adrenaline high post-jump is well worth the sweaty palms, mind boggling terror and increased laundry bill.
Jacked up on adrenaline, we indulged in the "Sunset Cruise",
an all you can eat and drink boat ride along the Zambezi as the sun sets, which followed the predictable course of relative civility at the beginning, only to descend into a cacophony of shrieks and triple gins as the evening wore on. There is, however, something truly magical about the African skyline, which cannot be conveyed by word or photograph. Yet another stunning moment. Until said tour leader, Stalin, decided to start waterboarding her passengers.
Another highlight was the full colonial experience High Tea at the local five star hotel followed by cocktails on the veranda as the sun set over the Zambezi, the froth of the Falls visible on the horizon. Having been accustomed to being consistently filthy in appearance and savage in behaviour for the past six weeks, this experience made us feel almost human. We were, however, conspicuous as overlanders rather than the slightly more upmarket customer to which the hotel is accustomed. Starved of food by aforementioned tour leader, we were betrayed by the feral glint in our eyes as we scoured the lavish spread (the best I have ever witnessed) and the silence that reigned as we furiously devoured our loaded plates like ravenous swine at the trough. Sugar hangover, anyone?
Again, Livingstone and the Falls are an unforgettable experience - other activities include walking with rhinos, getting up close with lions, jet boating, helicopter rides over the Falls, etc etc. Africa is a continent that never ceases to amaze and inspire, and overlanding must surely be the best way to experience this incredible continent. It is certainly full-on, very physical, and as much a lifestyle as a holiday, but the one sentiment you are guaranteed never to feel is disappointment.
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